Ways I can help

I usually work with clients in one of two ways.

Style Focused Programme is for people whose attachment patterns are affecting several areas of life at the same time and who are looking to move in the direction of secure attachment.

Problem Specific Programme is for people with one recurring issue that is causing disproportionate difficulty, even if attachment patterns may also be showing up elsewhere.

Style Focused programme

This is for people who recognise that attachment patterns are causing problems across several areas of life, including relationships, work and how they relate to themselves, and wish to become more securely attached.

The programme addresses patterns across different areas of your life, starting with those causing the most difficulty and adapting as we learn more about what's driving them.

The programme typically runs across around 12 sessions, with follow-up or accountability sessions available where helpful.

The programme follows a clear framework but is shaped throughout by what you're experiencing, what we learn about the drivers of your patterns, and what proves most effective in practice.

Discovery and initial focus

Complete a structured discovery questionnaire before the first session
Use your responses to identify the areas causing most difficulty, recurring patterns, and needs that may be going unmet
Agree the initial priorities and what you'd like to change

Working with current patterns

Sessions focus on recent triggering situations, friction points and recurring problems.

Break down what happened and how the pattern is operating
Identify the beliefs, expectations, emotional responses, needs and automatic strategies involved
Decide what needs to be addressed first, and in what order
Choose the most suitable interventions

Depending on the pattern, this may include:

Belief reprogramming
Behavioural change and graded exposure
Emotional regulation
Recognising and meeting needs
Communication
Recognising, setting and maintaining boundaries
Becoming more comfortable receiving from others
Earlier relational patterns where they're relevant to understanding what's happening now

Practice and updating

Put the relevant tools into practice between sessions
Review what happened, what changed and how manageable the practice felt
Adjust the approach as needed

Review and completion

Review progress around the midpoint of the programme
Reassess priorities and change the focus where needed
Consolidate the changes that are working
Identify situations where old patterns are most likely to reappear and plan how to respond
Leave with the tools to manage the patterns independently

Sessions are one hour, usually weekly or fortnightly.

Problem Specific programme

This is for people who have a specific issue: a recurring problem they want to change, even if they don’t fully understand why it keeps happening.

Problems I work with include:

Procrastination: Repeatedly putting off something you intend or need to do, despite knowing that delaying it is likely to make things worse.
Perfectionism: When high standards become rigid, exhausting, or make it difficult to finish.
Imposter syndrome: Underestimating your own ability, so that achievements or positions can feel unearned or unwarranted, often with a persistent fear of being exposed as less capable than others believe.
People-pleasing and boundary guilt: Difficulty saying no, prioritising yourself, or tolerating other people’s disappointment.
“I don’t know what I feel”: Difficulty noticing, identifying or making use of your emotional responses.
Relationship anxiety: Repeated reassurance-seeking, checking or preoccupation that only brings short-lived relief.
Pulling away when relationships become close: Losing feelings, panicking or wanting distance as intimacy increases.
“I don’t know what I want”: Difficulty knowing your own wants, needs, values or direction.

Typically 4–5 sessions, depending on the problem and what we find.

Discovery and planning

Explore when the problem occurs, what happens and how it affects your life.
Understand what’s contributing to the problem, including attachment patterns, learned coping strategies, stress responses and situational pressures.
Clarify what you’d like to be able to do differently.
Agree an initial focus and how we’ll recognise progress.

Active coaching work

Identify what triggers the problem and what keeps it going.
Introduce exercises and techniques suited to what we find.
Work on the relevant areas: beliefs and expectations, emotional responses, habits, needs, communication or boundaries.
Practise between sessions, applying what we’ve covered to situations in your everyday life.

Review and adjust

Review what’s improving and where you’re still getting stuck.
Use your experience between sessions to refine our understanding of the problem.
Adjust the focus or techniques where needed.

Completion

Review your progress and the approaches that have helped.
Identify situations where the problem could return and plan how to handle them.
Leave with the tools to continue working independently.

Ready to get started?

The first step is a free 20-minute introductory call.

If you’re not sure which programme fits, we can work that out together.

Book a free introductory call